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Does God “call” us to marry one certain guy/girl, or do we have freedom to choose, as long as they are Christian? Also, where does the relationship with our husband/wife rank in importance in our life? Should it be right under God?
Well, congratulations. You’ve managed to come up with not one, but TWO, unanswerable questions!
Which doesn’t mean however that I can’t talk about them... :o)
The key to both perplexities is actually a third question: how do I properly submit to the lordship of Christ? It’s a very important matter, and also one that is frequently abused or ignored in our contemporary culture.
One of the reasons masculinity and femininity are rarely considered to be significant these days is because we have placed a higher value on independence than we have on interdependence. Or, when we do consider our need for one another, we tend to view each other as equals.
But the Bible calls Jesus “Lord of lords.” The only way that can work is if He is Lord over men who are themselves lords over others. Masculinity is built on the notion that one individual can have responsibility for, and thus authority over, another. In our world, authority usually has to be earned. We like to follow good leaders, and we often get to pick those we think are most qualified.
However, God assigns lordship from the top down. God the Father made Jesus king over all creation. Jesus assigns earthly authorities: kings, husbands, fathers. They might not be particularly good authorities, or even like having authority at all. But have it they do…precisely because He said so. And He will most definitely hold them accountable for how they handle that authority.
When at salvation we enter the kingdom of God, we willingly embrace the lordship of Jesus (see John 13:13). From that point on (to put it simply) what He says goes. That’s what lordship requires. No votes. No earning. No argument.
It’s important to realize, however, that this is absolutely the BEST arrangement there could ever be! Why so? Because God made us, and because He perfectly loves us. Anything we might ever want to do that is different from what He wants is, quite frankly, dumb and disastrous.
So (steering back toward your questions), the best answer to all of life’s decisions is whatever He says is best.
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